I finally got to see my babes!!! =) hehe celebrate for her bday it was very nice to see her, joanne and them again...But hrmmm I didn't get to see Jesse!!! roar!!!* I was hoping I would see her...it's like destiny always pushes us a part =( we must fight back jesse!! lol I miss you though...roar!* >=P I'm in class right now...very boring...and I'm tired but not the kind of tired you get when you're sleepy...but I guess somewhat "stress" kind of tired...Parents aren't getting along again...heck when do they ever get along...-_-" always bitch about the same things...about money...how my dad is this and that and my mom is that and this...It's becoming repetitive...and I just don't know what to do about it yet...Like a typical chinese daughter...I don't know how to talk to my parents too well especially if it's something between them...I really just wanna move out...I don't wanna run away but than I just don't really like the fact that my parents always talk sh*t about each other to me...They always depend on me to chose whose right...whose wrong...blah blah blah...I never say much...I just listen and think to myself, how did it get this bad? and I also think about my future...I hope I don't have to go through this with my future husband...I really want a loving relationship...where my kids can grow up and feel secure, appreciative, and maybe a little more happy? I want my kinds to grow up knowing what's right, what's wrong...err I'm talking like I'm going to have a baby (WHICH I'M NOT) lol...but I've been thinking about a lot of stuff lately...I need to be more helpful at home...Well I think I'm pretty helpful...I do the laundry, dishes, throw away the garbage, other stuff...but then it's always never good enough...I don't ever want my kids to feel like that...that they're never good enough...I don't know, I fight it back a lot...Because I want to think positive because thinking negatively won't get me no where...So that's what I'm trying to do...Just that sometimes when there is too much sh*t happening it just brings me down...

"I sometimes sit and think how would it be to obtain that one thing we all go searching for or else deny our hearts of ever wanting something more...The perfect love, is the kind where imperfections become perfection...Something that money cant ever buy, but just those simple little things that makes our efforts shine through just because we cared enough to even try...We have to have lost for that one time in our lives to know love is something that could never be taken for granted...The greatest fleeting moment is knowing when you can love freely, without anything or anybody restraining your heart...When knowing you can give your all and not be afraid that what if one day you should ever fall...For love is a chance we take, a risk that if all else fails your willing accetepance to learn thru all of your prior mistakes, will eventually guide u through your hardest days...Unconditional, is for everything you come across, that person is with you to the very end...That may only come from a parents love to their children...Is a mother stupid if she still loves her child after they abuse her emotionally, mentally and physically? No, because above all else, if it was real love then it can withstand the roughest winds and anything that follows afterwards in between...

Denial that flows beneath our skin, into our veins; is just that one thing that associates itself with what we may call our pride...That wall that seems to barricade ourselves from ever feeling something more...Every path we lead, every choice we make foreshadows on what will become of our future...For the past is what makes us who we are today, though we are forever adapting...Nobody knows what love is, until they experiance every inch of it...wE have to be true to ourselves before we could ever be true to others...So the greatest gift we could ever give is the love that comes from within....The kind that defines it all...The diminishing doubts and confusion is when we know what we want...For there will be no questions about it, just a final resolution that we may finally call somebody 'The one'..."

taken from my sai lo's myspace <3

I haven't written in here for over a month!!! That's a new record for me!!! o_O and wow things have changed for xanga...I guess xanga is becoming more user friendly for those xanga NOOBs out there!!! =P Yeah I'm talking about you!

Well life has been so-so you know...the ups and downs...I can't believe that'll I'll be graduating in January...Well hopefully that is...Because I've passed all the classes they have given me...But than I don't know if I had all the classes that I NEED to graduate with...blah blah blah! I've noticed lately I haven't been hanging out with ANYONE...Like Amie, Joanne, Jesse....I guess I'm too busy playing games for anyone to contact me and tell me what they're up too!!! >=P *roar* I fuckin' miss you guys...YES YOU HEARD ME...FUCKIN' MISS YOU GUYS!!! I WANNA SIT ON AMIES LAP AGAIN!!! LOL WITH MY COLD BUTT AND I WANNA SING KAROAKE WITH YOU GUYS AGAIN!!! THAT WAS SUCH A WEIRD NIGHT...

err I don't know what else to write about...family is err okay...My dad changed his schedule...soo errm he comes home during the day...go to work in the middle of the morning >_< so he's always home with me my brother and I now =T and people can't come over!!! UNLESS!!! YOU'RE A GIRL OR DRESS LIKE A GIRL? lol j/p *^_^* well I hope everyone is doing extremely well!!! Smile...you don't know whose day you might brighten!

ohh yeah! I got a new harddrive!!! 250GB haven't installed it though =( must asked daddy...but than I'm always playing games >_<

Parents are crazy...And I'm crazy too...Like the other day I dreamt that my daddy threw away all the dishes...Yes I have weird dreams...and Guess what?!?!?!..............................

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IT HAPPENED!!!

I've noticed my parents can't spend more than a day together...how sad is that? If they spend more than a day together they get hella mad at each other...sighs* I rather have them at work...I was still asleep so I don't know what exactly happened before my dad threw away all the dishes...blah. Now both my parents are sleeping...It's never good to go to sleep angry but yeah that's their way...sighs* But whatever...Hmm my brother is gone too...I don't know where he went...I wish I could go to sleep more...but I slept too much >_<...Today is gonna be boring! I hope you guys are having an awesome fourth of july *^_^* ttyl!